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Selfishness | Good or bad?

In our society today, we tend to see selfishness as an enemy. And this is normal if we look at its basic definition: an excessive preoccupation with one's own interests at the expense of those of others and the community.


But although selfishness is a flaw that is frowned upon by the vast majority, it can also be considered a quality in some cases.


5 benefits of selfishness


1- Easier to let others live their lives as they want: If we took care of ourselves rather than others, fewer people would be unhappy. Indeed, who better to take care of oneself than oneself? Instead of waiting for others to be happy, why not take care of yourself? So, if you learn to define your goals and what makes you happy, you can more easily help others to do so. Because if you are happy, those around you will certainly be happier too.


2- Easier to take responsibility for yourself and your life: Most people blame others for their unhappiness and think that their well-being depends on the outside world. While being more selfish, we don't have to wait for others to help us, because we know we can rely on ourselves. It is to take responsibility for everything we do including our happiness. In other words, we make our own misfortune, but our own happiness too.


3- Easier to have self-confidence: The main fault of people is to anticipate too often the reaction of others. They refrain from doing this or that thing for fear of what the people around them or the person in front of them might think. However, we often have a totally erroneous idea of what will happen in reality. You have to stop trying to think for people and you have to trust yourself.


4- Easier to be realistic and to give up: It is important to identify what you really want in life, even if it is not always easy. Sometimes, by dint of spreading ourselves too thin and letting ourselves live, we forget to focus on the essential. Even some people don't think about what they really want because they are afraid of failure for example. Once you have identified your needs and goals, you can act accordingly.


5- Easier to save time: People are always overwhelmed and sometimes it is as if they have no time to do anything. The main reason for this is that we have difficulty identifying what is important to us. So we often avoid what is most important to us by saying that we don't have time, that in reality, we put that time on less important things. We must not lose sight of the fact that a thousand trivialities cannot replace a single thing that matters to us. And, at the end of the day, even if you feel like you've done a lot, the feeling of dissatisfaction will always prevail.


If what matters most to you is finishing a file at the office, focus only on that file until you finish it. Unplug your phone if you have to, refuse to go for coffee with your colleagues and dare to say no if you are asked to do something else. You will have finished it well in time and you will certainly still have time to do something else. In other words, you will have saved time and accomplished what was important to you.



Selfishness well tempered


Several studies have shown that people grow out of their selfish motivations and persevere more in charitable organizations. Conversely, more self-centered individuals are so dependent on a group that if they don't get enough approval, they are disappointed and give up more easily than so-called "selfish" people. Caring about oneself is psychologically healthy. What is not healthy is caring only about yourself or not caring enough and sacrificing yourself all the time.



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